vertiginous

I was, how old? It was a rave. It was loud. It was colourful. It was wild. Of course it was, what do you expect, it was a rave. It was exciting. It was exhilarating. It was touchy-feely, very touchy and very feely.

It was sensual.

Limbs everywhere, including mine, all writhing and colliding, so many limbs belonging to so many bodies, to so many people in various states of dress and, yes, undress, bare arms, bare legs, shorts and short skirts, summer dresses, plaited tresses, loose shirts, tight shirts, tight jeans, tie dye all stretched or draped from this girl and that guy and me, yes, I was there, of course I was there. It was bliss. It was dizzy. It was ecstasy.

It was ecstasy.

It was addictive. It was beats. It was rhythms. It was resonance. It was the decadence, we rolled like competing tides, we crashed against one another but nobody cared. It was carefree. It was rule-free. It was anarchy. We were flotsam. We were jetsam. We were floating jeopardy. We were unrestrained, unleashed, uninhibited, unrestricted.

It was dangerous.

It was luscious, lascivious, wanton, delicious. It was all there was for the night, as though nothing came before and noting came after. We were locked between two ticks of the dandelion clock. We were high. We were in flight. We whirled. We swirled. Emotions stirred. Passions unfurled. Nature burned within us and without, every single soul without exception, not one cared about confession.

It was infamous

I was in a summer dress. I was in a dress, loose, short, no sleeves printed in leaves and flowers, colourful, button up the front, it moved with me in perfect synchrony, following my swishes and my sways, the lights moved through a random groove picking out the bits of white on the dress and made it glow, so close, so many, so close, the sweat, so close, the smell of heat, of nubile intensity, I was in a summer dress.

He stood behind me, then he was in front, then behind again, then in front, moving as I moved, mimicking, me him or him me, or maybe that’s just how it seemed. He stood behind me then in front, hands upon my waist, then on my hips then on my waist then on my hips, I felt them through the cotton, fingers long, grip sure, hands on my waist then on my hips, on my hips, holding firm, on my hips, steady hold, on my hips, didn’t let go, I turned on them like a spinning top as his touch moved round. I was unaware of all the places that they touched, where they touched, they touched and touched as I spun round and around inside his hands, trapped between his palms and the beats, the beats, more and more and more.

It was unstoppable.

Back to front, front to back, back front his hands move from my waist to my hips to my waist to my hips to my waist to my breasts, feeling me, kneading me, squeezing me, so many limbs crashing and colliding, so many bodies indulging and imbibing, his hands held me tight, it felt right when everything and anything goes. Back to front, front to back, his hands moved from my breasts to my waist, to my hips, to my breasts again and again, so many people, nobody noticed, nobody cared, not him, not me, not them, nobody noticed, or did they?

It was delectable.

Top button came undone, second button came undone, third button came undone, how many buttons do I have, did I ever count them, fourth button came undone, his hands moved down to my waist, to my hips, to my breasts, to my bra, black, touch of lace, feeling me, kneading me, squeezing me, I didn’t mind. A crush of bodies each one entranced in their own trance, we had become one organism, or one slow and edging orgasm, breath, sweat, skin, hormones, an alchemical spectacle, a haze of daze, a frenzy of senses, neurones firing all at once continuous, spontaneous, infectious, delicious.

It was insatiable.

Hem up, hem down, dress swayed side to side, brushed hands, brushed air infused with scented sensuality, hem up, hem down, whose touch, your touch, my touch, their touch, whose touch, holdups only go so far up, as far as the hand goes, to the top, bare skin I feel, bare skin, my bare skin, my inner thigh your hand finds, hem up, hem down, just enough, inner thigh, outer thigh, one hand, both hands, your hands, yes. Now I know, now I feel, feel more.

It was intensity.

Electricity, my legs shake as I flail my arms raised, yours running down the underside, dress still open, buttons one, two, three, four, I’ve opened a door and let you in, let them in, everyone in, everyone’s here orbiting each other, pulled into each other, cyclical. The edge of my bra, breasts, edge of my waist, in and out over my hips, your hands, my thighs, hem up, hem up, hem up, between, hand between, a motion stirs a commotion inside my muscles, my tendons, my bones, my veins, my soul. So soft. So firm. Your grip, I slip further down, further down, I can’t do nought but fall and keep falling, we move,

we move, weaving between this tangling dream that isn’t a dream, whose hands, your hands, whose hands, not your hands, so many hands imprinting on my, I am a cave inside which you’ll spray your paint around the shape of your hand, your hands, writing history upon my heart, we move, further from the centre of this universe to the outer reaches, the event horizon, back against a wall, a wall streaming with cool, a wall, dark as the dark where light never finds, it found me, catches my eyes in a glint undenied.

It was insanity.

Upon on a table, opening wide, opened wide, hands teasing open me wide, lips lock me down, lock my words in, lock my voice out, can’t say yes, can’t say no, can’t refuse adrenalin’s fuse that’s been lit by a match made in not heaven but somewhere only the shadows dare to go. I’m here, you’re here, everyone is here, the music unloads its rhythms of fusion and fission, wish upon a fairy light, hem up, hem up, legs wide, hem up, hem up, another button loosening my will. Down they come,

satin, black, seamless, peeled away, hem up, peeled down, open wide, I’m open wide, bare thighs, flying high, he’s inside, inside, again then again, inside my bare thighs, the beats burrow into me, deeper, deeper, harder, harder, in time, out of time, out of place, out of mind, out of my mind. Shadows play their tricks, the room is alive, the wall is alive, the table is alive, my legs are wide, he is all inside. A new groove hits the floor and scrambles up the wall and into my spine up to my skull and down to my thighs, open wide, I’m open wide, opening wider, he is inside, we match the tempo knowing instinctively where it will go; it goes where it will.

It was erogenous.

I find a voice, my own, I moan, soft and low, I moan afraid to show, I moan louder as no one can hear, will hear, are all in their own blissful shells, shaken and taken with every thrust, every bare thrust, trickles percolate from each pore, thighs wide, I stifle then don’t a scream, a release, in here no one can you scream, hem up, up, up, inside me, up, up, inside me, he’s close, closer, intimate, personal, he’s here, he’s there, he’s unrestrained. He falls, we fall, together, pulling the whole room into our black hole, no control, breaking like a storm cloud. I feel, I feel, I feel, give in, I gave in,

he gave into the flow,

it was vertiginous.

© Emmaleela